I never pretended to be smart at all. in fact, i've always admitted to a couple of friends that when a choose a partner, a huge part of my standard is the physical look.Gusto ko yung madaming may gusto, gusto ko ung gwapo, kasi there's something inside me that wants to feel like a goddess knowing that I have one of the best looking men around. I want to be envied because everything is perfect. Some close friends just smile it off but one time, a friend straightforwardly called me shallow. (of course,i did not take it negatively) because i knew it was indeed true.... I answered back, told her that I'm just also concerned for my future children ...gust ko kasi good looking sila..hehe...

Until one person struck me. He never had the great hair, the height, the gym-toned body, and the swiveling looks that i've always wanted.. But he was the only person in my entire life who made me feel like I'm an important person in his... and that I'm too special to let go of. He had a good heart and always kept a sincere smile on his face. Everyone loves him because he never put down people and has always kept humble. That was when everything turned around and completely changed.

I hope and pray that this never ends.Ü

Tagal na ha..

well ang tagal na since my last. for an update, let me tell you that i am gaining weight. i stopped smoking (though i tend to light about two in a week), ate more and i'va started drinking milk every night before i sleep. effective naman! i gained 4 pounds already, and i hope it goes on until i'm alright. congratulations, ouie!Ü marunong na din ako magluto kahit papano, and yun.
but this isn't the best of my life yet, i know i still need to do something important so i can finally feel happy.
I hope God would help...

Birthday Resolutions

Very late resolutions. My birthday was weeks ago but i finished my ten item list just yesterday. I know they're made to be broken but i hope i can do at least three of these:

1. FINALLY Quit on the vice that I've intended to quit MONTHS AGO.

2.Find a nice and sensible boyfriend and not form romantic attachments to proclaimed losers, self-absorbed megalomaniacs, jerks (thanks, Bridget), Michael Jackson look-alikes,and, *good looking guys who tend to use their overpowering physical attributes and fake charm for abusive intentions.

3.gain about ten pounds more...and try my best not to get frustrated if im close to giving up!

4. Learn how to cook seriously.

5.Buy myself an expensive gift worth the spend.

6.Renovate. or redesign a few parts of the house, impress my parents and show them where their hard-earned money and their indefiable patience took me.

7. Start a small business.

8. Go out of town on a *Responsible* overnight with friends, without parental supervision and other stupid inhibitions.

9. De-clutter my room. Napanood ko kasi sa Oprah...and i thought, why not do it?

10. Find Out The Best Things In My Life That Are Free.

mga pointless informatives:

i got this from cosmopolitan (which is, my very favorite magazine)....kahit walang kinalaman to sa mga importanteng kung ano-ano eh lalagay ko na din.

1.Guys w/ sexy voices has extra advantage when it comes to dating, accordning to a recent survey....90% of singles said a date's annoying voice could be a romantic deal breaker --hay nako, eh kahit naman walang study and survey,,,abviously, nakaka-irita talaga. sorry guys, miuns points...

2. [my personal favorite:]
"Being in love doesn't just make you swoon it also makes you STUPID. A study found that romantic feelings inhibit parts of the brain responsible for critical thinking." ---i actually agree on that matter because yeah, ive been through a (very) stupid phase before...i hope it doesn't happen again, or at least not as stupid as how i've been.

**actually, madami pa,,kaso its "too green", if that's the right description. maybe nextime.Ü

i am very very bored

sorry sa last post...i just read it aloud to myself a while ago and na realize ko na it sounds stupid..ehehe sorry ha.
but anyway, i just want to type in something. lets see....ryt now im eating cold porkchops and a bowl of 1 hour old instant noodles in front of the pc with a box of tissue,and a pile of used ones, sneezing every minute.seems like a bad time to share something to be happy about today....gotta go i better sleep now Ü

Time for quarterly anger cleanup!

sorry ha...pero wla na akong paki kung ikaw o ako ang may kasalanan basta it's either naiirita o galit ako sayo. or pwede ring malapit na akong mainis...ganun.....Ü
at dahil mild-mannered lady ako eh ndi ako magn-name drop.blind items lang.

top five: clue- he's an unproclaimed gay 10%bitch
+excuse me, no one from us wants to take that top dean's list from you so stop acting exaggerately protective. yeah, there's nothing wrong with doing best even when you don't really have to, but it's kind of irritating. ID RATHER LOSE THE TOP LIST IN SCHOOL AND JUST STAY IN SHAPE THAN TO HAVE NO TRUE FRIENDS AT ALL.. smiley..

top four: clue- she may remind you of witchcraft
+this gal isn't doing anything to me at all....but i'm one of those whom she slightly irritates.alam mo, lahat nga bagay sa mundo na sobra, masama. at ang OVERconfidence ay hindi exception dun. pati rin ang excessive use of the english language...(yes, there is such a thing as that, believe me)...at pati na rin ang overused bitch attitude. UNTIL YOU DECIDE TO CHANGE THE BAD HALF OF YOU, AN ATTITUDE LIKE THAT WOULD DEFINITELY PULL YOU AWAY FORM THE SO-CALLED "BIG BREAK" YOU'RE HANGING FOR.

top three: clue- he's our larger dog.
+wla akong maisip na ilagay sa top three, pero bagay naman sya dito. he's our larger dog. bart! sa sobrang ka-smartehan ng asong ito its nakakabwiset na. ang ingay ingay parang bading. hay nako, hindi porket sya ang nagbabantay ng bahay ay may karapatan na syang makipagsabayan sa boses ng nanay namen. nag-guilty ako pag binabato ko ng tsinelas minsan pero kung ako nasa lugar nyo din cguradong magagawa nyo din un...ask my family...

top two: clue-they think i can handle her well, but, no. 65% of the time, she's the table-lunch and mall-walking conversational topic"
+PLEASE DON'T CHALLENGE MY PATIENCE.

top ONE! clue:every person who knows me well probably knows him.
+i'm not irritated. i'm angry. but thanks anyway for making me a LOT stronger. but the thing is, i've lost my trust. and i've also lost my confidence to trust others when it comed to certain things. you may have made me a better person, but you ruined my life..good thing i'm still ok,and i seem ok, but i'm not, and i haven't completely forgiven you and myself for a couple of reasons.

"We get to hate a person in so much anger and pain only when we loved them a lot more than how we should have." -Dr.Phil

Young and Angry

Now let's go to politics:

Have you watched the local news lately? Grabe, nakakapagod nang manood ng walang katapusang pagalingan ng ating mga dear gov't officials pagdating sa opinions nila kung ano ba talaga ang dapat mangyari. Ok lang kahit mukha nang corny to,pero talaga lang, ang baba na ng morale ng pilipino (including me!) kasi from the looks of it, mukhang wala na talagang pag-asa ang pilipinas. At kung meron mang solution, it's probably gonna be at least 7 years bago mangyari un. At eto pa, kahit umalis si Gloria sa position nya, eh may papalit ba namang matino?!
Closest answer to that daw ay si Susan Roces....heard it from the TV. Or Noli deCastro daw. shucks naman...yeah they're kind and concerned and loving and God-fearing,but it's not all tha we need. The two things i'd rather find in a President is Loyalty and the Brainpower to solve things and make 'em right.

(**baka magulpi ako ng mga patriotic communists and political analysts pag nabasa nila 'to...)
Sana, kung mabibigyan ng chance ang pilipinas, at kung masusunod lang ako, (w/c is far from happening) I'm in favor of placing the country under the american government. Cmon, own us... I've learned to disregard the patriotism na, and the history of how our heroes fought for freedom. Kasi naman diba, ang taas ng pride ng Pilipino. at walang ginawa kundi tumalak kaysa kumilos. Kaya un nga,..hindi naman tayo mapapakain ng Philippine History and it's Preservation.